Amortentia
by anotherbadpxem
Summary: Amortentia. For one Slytherin girl, the scent of it remains the same: it always starts off as lovely as her friends describe it, but there is something deeply wrong with it. Emilie keeps telling herself that it's normal, but is there something wrong with her? - This story contains Harry Potter OC's, no named HP characters exist -
1. Chapter 1

It's almost impossible to miss.

A sweet and beautiful scent that would cause a smile to appear out of nowhere, followed by a sickly odour that made her wish that she had never smelt it in the first place. The former was never worth suffering through the latter.

Amortentia.

The potion was easy enough to spot, especially after some joker in her house had decided that they wanted her to taste the vile excuse for a love potion. The smell seemed to follow her everywhere; she assumed that the smell was fixed, and stayed the same for everyone. If not, well, it had always smelt the same to her. Hot chocolate that only grew sweeter, until you had a headache. Candyfloss that overflowed with sugar, until you felt nauseated from the smell alone. It was something entirely wonderful, with something lingering there, something wrong; the scent grew sicklier, more horrid, forcing her to eventually leave the room.

The most dangerous love potion that created the darkest of wizards. She was never even tempted to associate herself with such a thing.

'I may be a Slytherin, but I will never be like _him_.'

Emilie sighed and exited the cabin she and her friends were sitting in. They were exhausting her already, and it was the first day of term – they hadn't even made it back to Hogwarts yet!  
"I'm going to see where the sweet trolley is," she had told them. "I've got a craving for a chocolate frog."

The blonde peered into every cabin as she passed, hoping for an empty one. Accepting defeat when she reached the last cabin, which had just one person in, the sigh escaped her lips again. It was the least crowded cabin on the train, even if she had to share it with a Gryffindor. 'I suppose it will do,' Emilie thought.

"There's no more empty cabins," the Slytherin announced as she entered. The Gryffindor who occupied the cabin looked up from his book momentarily, shrugged, and carried on reading.

"Do you mind if I just -?" She asked, making her way to the seat opposite him.

"Do I have a choice?" He didn't glance up, but something about his posture informed her that the last thing he wanted was guests. He was hostile.

"And I thought Slytherins were the cold ones," she joked. "You could at least show a little courtesy."

This time, the Gryffindor looked up. He closed his book with an audible snap, looking her up and down. "Why should I, exactly?"  
The tone of his voice was as hostile as his posture; but his black hair reflected in the sunlight beautifully and perfectly contrasted with his dark skin, his eyes were the kind of chocolate brown that swallowed up whoever looked into them. She would be willing to bet that his smile was to die for – if and when he smiled. Still, she felt nothing towards him. Perhaps if he were a little nicer…

"I mean, you did just barge into my cabin, expecting me to be okay with it," he continued.

"I'll leave if you want." Emilie's voice was much quieter now and she shifted her gaze out of the window. The blonde stared out of it dreamily, enjoying the last bit of tranquillity before he told her that yes, she had to get out of his cabin.

Everything was silent for a while, longer than Emilie had assumed it would take him to make his decision. Finally, the Gryffindor sighed, breaking the silence.

"If you're quieter than your friends, you can stay."

"Why do you think I left them in the first place?" She asked playfully, and rolled her eyes. "I'm Emilie, by the way."

"Arun."

"It's nice to meet you. I'll let you get back to your book, though."

Arun smiled and gave her a small nod, before burying his face into the book once more. Emilie returned to looking out of the window, watching the beautiful scenery pass them by. Sure, Beauxbatons and Durmstrang were probably surrounded by scenery which the locals would say surpassed that of the English countryside, but those sceneries were probably not so quaint. It was beautiful. It was home.

Glancing back to the Gryffindor sitting opposite her, Emilie noticed the book in his hand. This was the first time that she had noticed the title:

'Amortentia: The Theories of Nothingness.'

Emilie tilted her head, a lock of golden hair fell over her face and went unnoticed by her. This book had caught hold of her curiosity, and it didn't seem to be letting go.

The theories of nothingness. What was the nothingness?  
Why was there more than one theory on this subject?  
Would it be deemed rude to interrupt Arun to ask?

A loud, forced cough knocked her out of her reverie before she could even think about the answers to any of the questions filling her mind. Emilie's green eyes shifted upward to Arun's own, he was looking directly at her (and she couldn't help but admit that he was handsome). A blush started to creep onto the blonde's cheeks.

"Do you mind?" Arun asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Sorry, it's just, your book –" She shook her head. "Never mind."

He didn't question her further, moving his attention back to his book. It didn't remain there for long, and he glanced back up at the girl. She was looking out of the window again, possibly a 5th year, and a Slytherin. He was more intrigued by her mention of his book, though, and he watched her for a while. It appeared that she wasn't going to ask her question on his book.

Soon, she got up and exited the cabin. When she came back, she was dressed in her robes.

"You should probably change, too." She told him. "We'll be arriving soon."


	2. Chapter 2

The Gryffindor must have decided that he could trust this girl with his things, because he took his trunk with him but left everything else in their place. A music gadget that her muggle-born friend had informed her was called an 'iPod', a quill and a scrap piece of parchment he seemed to be doodling on - _and that book._

Emilie's gaze fixed on it, remaining there for a while. She shifted it to the cabin door. He had gone to change, surely she could just take a little look at the book? It had intrigued her so, and she felt the need to know what this '_nothingness_' was. It might be able to explain her repulsion to the potion; it was possible that she had some form of allergy, like everyone always tried so hard to convince her, but no one had ever heard of an allergy causing the potion to smell disgusting. It was something **more**.

She couldn't wait any longer. The blonde snatched up the book and started to read the inside cover. From this, she gathered three things: the research in this book was gathered by an American wizard, there is something in the Muggle world known as 'aromanticism' and that it was possible she suffered from this condition (whatever it was).

Relief hit her with a huge amount of force; a train crashing into a leaf, which was happy enough before, but then it gets carried along for the ride. And it was a good ride. Finally, there was some explainable reason why amortentia smelt the way that it did, and she just needed to find out what it as before –

An interrupting cough sounded from the doorway. It dragged Emilie kicking and screaming from her daydream, and she flinched. The book she was so engrossed in slipped out of her hands and landed on the floor with a rather loud thud.

"I- I'm sorry." The Slytherin managed to stammer in the direction of Arun. "I was just really interested in your book and…well, I guess I should be going now that I've invaded your privacy. _Sorry_." She repeated the word again. It was supposed to be an apology, but is she was honest, it was a relatively feeble one considering the circumstances. As she stood, Arun didn't talk, he only moved to pick up his book.

"Here." He held it out to her. "I'm not going to force you to stay, but I've read this book already. It was just some light reading for the train. Take it."

Emilie stared, open-mouthed, at the Gryffindor stood in front of her. He had just caught her invading his privacy, and his immediate reaction was to give her a gift? This didn't make sense.

"Oh. Thank you. Are you sure? Thank you!" The blonde's smile stretched across her face completely as she took the book from his hand. "I just - amortentia smells really…funny to me. I don't smell what anyone else does, not freshly washed clothes like Lucy or roses like Thomas. And I thought that this might explain it." She examined the book for a little longer, before realising that she'd just gushed her feelings to a Gryffindor that probably didn't care. "Sorry, I know you didn't ask. I just needed to - I don't know."

Arun smirked at her, she was getting flustered, and it was amusing. It was the behaviour his friends would probably label as 'cute', and it was to him as well, just not in the same way. "It's okay. Just read it, and then come and find me or something. I want to know what you think."

Emilie thanked him again, before exiting the cabin. She hid the book under her jacket, then sneaked it inbetween the robes in her trunk when she arrived back at her own cabin, still smiling from the encounter.


	3. Chapter 3

Emilie spent her nights reading Arun's book. She waited until her friends had gone to bed, always, they were bound to ask questions and she wanted to avoid that for now. She could be prepared for any questions once she'd finally figured this out for herself. But to answer her friend's curious interrogations while being under-educated herself? Well, it would be embarrassing to say the least; and much easier for them to convince themselves that there was something wrong with her.

By the light of her wand, she could just make out the words: _An aromantic person experiences little or no romantic attraction. Aromanticism is a spectrum, including demiromantic, lithromantic and aromantic, although these are not the only orientations on the spectrum. As it is a spectrum it is possible for any person, wizard or muggle, to fall anywhere upon it – including between two of the distinguished points._

The more that she read, the more Emilie found herself understanding who she was. Finally, she was feeling less like a stranger in her own body and more like a normal person. And Arun's book had been the object which lead her into this revelation.

Reading the book itself did not take long, it was fairly short and simple to understand. Despite this, Emilie kept the book for a few more days, enough to reread it and attempt to decide where she fell on the spectrum; she could only attempt, because if sexuality and emotions were as fluid as the author made out, then how could she put a distinguished label on herself? Today she could be aromantic, but tomorrow she could meet someone and perhaps wonder if she was demiromantic, or perhaps grey-romantic.

In all of her confusion, there was one thing the Slytherin knew for sure: she had a newfound hatred of labels, and society's need for them.

When it became clear to her that the confusion wasn't going to leave her easily – especially without talking to someone who had more knowledge on the subject – Emilie found herself crossing the Great Hall to where the Gryffindors sat, and being met with more than a couple of stares. Perhaps now wasn't the best time, but Emilie had already spotted Arun, and there wasn't much stopping her now; besides, she could hardly turn back when she was already halfway across the hall. He had told her to go and talk to him, right? So why shouldn't she? She needed answers and, whether or not the rest of his house gave her permission, she was getting them.

"Arun?" Emilie asked cautiously. He had his back to her as she approached, a couple of friends had noticed her walking his way and started to nudge each other, sly, teasing smirks on their faces. Arun was about to glance around to see what they were going on about now when he heard her voice.

"Hi," Arun turned around with a smile, a much more genuine one than the one plastered on the neighbouring boys' faces, after attempting to quieten his friends. "Did you finish the book, then?"

"Yeah, I mean, I haven't got it with me right now…" Emilie noticed the glace he had given her empty arms. "I was still trying to figure some things out, but I was hoping we could talk about it?" _Perhaps somewhere without your entourage of typical teenage boys_, she added silently.

The Gryffindor agreed, standing just as his friends erupt into a chorus of laughter and various taunts are called to him. He appeared to ignore them, gesturing for Emilie to follow him.

He lead Emilie to the seventh floor, she was following him cautiously, and she had no idea where he was taking her. The walk itself seemed to take a while, but it was relaxed and, while they weren't talking much, Emilie felt comfortable with Arun. She wasn't sure if it was because now they had something in common: the book, and perhaps even their romantic orientations. Of course, she didn't want to assume anything. He was just reading the book, that didn't prove him to be aromantic any more than reading a typical romance novel proved anyone "alloromantic". That was another term that she'd picked up from the book: a grouped term for those who do feel romantic attraction, no matter what their preferences.

"I need you to do something for me," Arun glanced at Emilie. She was falling slightly behind and he paused until she was next to him. "Think of a room. We need a room to talk. Just keep repeating that in your head."

It sounded like a bizarre request but Emilie was happy to comply, She thought of it as Arun continued to walk, and she followed him. She thought of it as Arun turned around and walked the other way. She was starting to feel confused, and almost took her mind off the room, but then she saw it.

A door had appeared, where she was sure there was no door before.

"A friend of the infamous Harry Potter showed it to me," Arun smiled as he opened the door. "It's called the room of requirement - pretty cool, huh?"

Emilie nodded enthusiastically, following Arun into this mysterious room with a flash of awe in her eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

The room was cosy enough, though not quite as Emilie had imagined it. There were some beanbags scattered around on the floor, a few bookshelves leaning against the far wall (they looked pretty well stocked, too) and what looked like the utensils and ingredients needed to make any hot drink they would like. Arun headed straight for the tea, whilst Emilie wandered over to the part of the room which had caught her interest: the bookshelf.

"Hey, Braveheart, look at this!" Emilie called, without taking her eyes off the shelves.

"Braveheart?" Emilie didn't need to turn around to hear the mockery dripping from his voice.

"Yeah. Braveheart. You know, the lion, the bravery. Are you a Gryffindor or what? Come and look at this," she motioned with her hand, a feeble attempt to get him to hurry up.

"For your information, I am scared of spiders," he rolled his eyes, not that she could see, and joined her by the bookshelf.

He was amazed. It was filled with books on aromanticism and asexuality; those ones which weren't theory-based, he assumed would have an asexual author, or an aromantic character in the story, or else, why would they be there? It seemed to be their very own secret library.

"Looks like I don't have to read the same book again," Arun mused, a smile on his face. "If you want it, that book's yours."

Emilie couldn't hear him, though, she was at the other end of the shelf and she was picking up book after book, making a small pile which she was struggling to carry. She might not want labels, but informing herself more couldn't hurt, right? Arun's book had mentioned asexuality, but it never went into detail. Here was all the detail she needed, both on the small things left out of the first book, and the spectrum of asexuality which sometimes ran alongside aromanticism. She hadn't felt this happy and relieved since the first time she read the word 'aromantic'.

With a look to Emilie, Arun smiled at her. For the first time, he felt this special kind of connection between them. She had been nice enough to him, and since he had been in the grey-area of aromantic and asexual for a while now, he wanted to help out someone who seemed lost and confused by the whole idea. It was a good deed. But she made him feel particularly warm inside. It wasn't a romantic attraction, that tended to be reserved for men (in his past experience, anyway), but it was strong, and it was loving. He felt protective over someone for the first time in a while, and he wanted desperately to call this girl his friend.

With excited eyes and a childish happiness, Emilie stumbled over to Arun, struggling with her tower of books. The Slytherin collapsed onto a beanbag across from where Arun was standing, dropping her books next to her and opening the book which was on top.

"This is amazing," Emilia whispered, smiling from ear to ear.

Arun smiled back, dragging a second beanbag over to her and sitting down. "I do wish this library had chairs," he joked, getting comfortable.

But Emilia didn't hear him, she was absorbed in her own little world, provided by the book in her hands.

"Hey," Arun pulled the book away from her, his eyebrows arching as he looked at her. "I thought that we were here to talk?"

Emilia rolled her eyes in response, almost snatching the book back from Arun, but he was right. The Slytherin sat up slightly, preparing herself for this conversation.

"So..." She began, not totally sure about where to go from there. "Amortentia smells weird to me, which is why your book intrigued me. In fact, it doesn't really smell of anything.

"I don't really like labels any more, they're too confusing and they seem to cause a lot of aggravation in the LGBT+ community. But I think the closest one to me would be aromantic.

"I guess, I was just wondering, why you have the book in the first place?" Her eyes remained transfixed on her hands which sat in her lap.

"Well, it's a slightly long story," he paused there to take a small breath. "I'm aroflux and aceflux. It doesn't touch on it much in that particular book, but I can occasionally phase in and out of aromantic and asexual as orientations, with those two being my default. At least, that's how I experience it."

Emilie felt herself breathing a sigh of relief. There was someone who understood her, who wouldn't judge her; her friends certainly weren't like that and she didn't even want to think about her parents. Coming out wasn't something which she could really consider right now. Especially when so many people haven't heard of aromanticism, or even the idea of a split attraction model; she didn't want to be labelled as 'abnormal'.

Arun noticed this internal conflict. The signs were minute, but he had lived them, and they were there.

Getting up, he placed her book back on her pile.

"Can I make you a drink? It'll help. I promise."

Emilie smiled. Somehow, she trusted Arun was right. With a nod, she began to feel a lot more comfortable than she had ever been before.


End file.
